Quick Hits: Now with Special Requests!

It has been a wild couple of weeks... black kids getting a taste of racism, politicians quitting or shacking up with South American chicks, carpenter's losing their tools... I hardly know where to begin!

For Jane: "Hey Governor Palin – Nobody Likes A Quitter!"

When Karl Rove is wondering just what the hell you're doing, you know you're on the train to crazy town.

And hell, she’ll probably run for mayor!

I watched a special report on her soon after she quit. Diane Sawyer or someone like her went to Alaska and interviewed her while she was salmon fishing with the family. Palin was so inarticulate, so awkward that I honestly have no idea how she ever got elected to be Governor. I think the men up there voted for her just to see a MILF on the news.

When I say MILF, please remember that we are talking about Alaska where it is dark half the year and they have the highest ratio of unmarried men to unmarried women in the U.S. (U.S. Census Bureau)

Honestly, this is the person who thought they could be one missed heart beat from the Presidency? If she can't even finish one term as Governor of Alaska, how in God's name did she expect to survive Washington D.C.?

It Doesn't Wash Off You Rich Racist Pigs

A swim club near Philadelphia agreed to rent out it's pool to a day camp once a week. You see, the camp has no pool and the camp directors thought it would be nice if these kids had a chance to go to a pool one a week during the dog days of summer. The camp wrote a check to the Valley Swim Club for $1,950. The club took the check, and on June 29th, 65 kids ranging from 7th grade to kindergarten showed up and started swimming.

That's when it got interesting. You see, the kids attending the Creative Steps, Inc. day camp are black. And it wasn't long before three of the children went to the day camp executive director and said they heard club members asking why blacks were at the club.

Several days later the day camp's check was returned, their access to the pool had been rescinded. When asked why the club shut these kids out, the club President John Duesler made the following statement:

"There was concern that alot of kids would change the complexion .....and the atmosphere of the club."

Complexion? A Freudian slip?

Just because the sheets on your head are 400 thread count imported cotton, you are still a racist.

I have a question for you Mr. Duesler, how many minorities belong to your club? I think it is time for the Feds to do a little census. Separate but equal started going bye-bye in 1954 after Brown v. Board of Education you nasty little bigots.

If I was the ACLU and/or the NAACP, I'd be researching case law right now to hit you folks in the only place it hurts you... your wallets.

Here is the Valley Club website. Look at every photo and tell me...do you see anything but Wonder Bread white faces? I sure don't.

Man Loses Manhood Building Cabinets for Mom

Ouch doesn’t cover it. Little did I know that cabinet making required a jock strap and an iron cup.

And my wife wonders why I’m so useless at home repair. Self preservation baby, self preservation.

Another One Bites the Dust

Listen, neither party is clean when it comes to sex scandals. Edwards, Spitzer, Clinton, Hart, all Democrats who got caught putting their willies where they didn’t belong. But the Democrats haven’t been running around for the past twenty years screaming “family values” while they suck campaign cash out of the religious right and the bible belt.

Gov. Sanford of South Carolina is now the latest in a string of high profile Republicans who have caught cheating or sexing up the wrong person.

You had to love that whole lie about where he was when he was off the South America to bonk his Argentinean love muffin. Hiking the Appalachian Trail?

Seriously?

I think what you meant to say is he was off "humping Argentinean tail."

But he isn’t alone on the Republican Honor Roll of Sexual Hypocrisy. Let’s just look at a few highlights, shall we?

2009: John Ensign, Senator from Nevada, refuses to resign after confessing to an extramarital affair with a married staffer, claiming she was trying to extort him.

2008: Vito Fossella, the only Republican member of Congress from New York City, admitted to police to having a child out-of-wedlock when stopped for drunk driving.

2007: Larry Craig Republican Senator for Idaho, was arrested on July 11, 2007, by plainclothes police officer investigating complaints of lewd behavior in a Minneapolis-St. Paul International Airport airport men's room.

David Vitter, junior Senator from Louisiana, became one of the few high-profile politicians to be implicated as a client of "D.C. Madam"

2006: Mark Foley, Republican Representative, Florida Sixteenth Congressional District. Resigned after trying to solicit sex from male congressional pages via an instant messenger program. The conversations included his asking a sixteen-year-old "stud" whether his penis was erect and requesting that he take out and measure his penis. The cover-up involved Republican House Majority Leader John Boehner, Ohio Eighth Congressional District and Republican House Speaker Dennis Hastert, Illinois Fourteenth District.

And while I normally stay away from staffers because they weren’t elected on their lies, this one is just too good (bad?) to pass up.

Alan David Berlin, He is an aide for Senator Jane Orie of Pennsylvania. He is also a furry who contacted a fifteen year old boy over the Internet, and offered to "yiff" the boy in a panda outfit, while his parents weren't home. The parents discovered the graphic emails on the boy's computer and called the Attorney General's child predator unit sometime in May. Police raided his home and discovered various furry outfits such as a wolf costume, as well as a cat outfit; all complete with two holes cut out at the undersides of the costumes.

He was arraigned in Dauphin County jail on a $250,000 bail.

(Credit for list: dkosopedia )

Champion Ice Princess Busted

They don’t call meth “Ice” for nothing I guess.

Nicole Bobek, the 1995 U.S. Figure Skating Champion was taken down in a drug raid targeting a methamphetamine ring. Her mother Jana Bobek was quoted as saying her daughter likes to "party".

Thanks Mom. That's going to go over real well at trial.

I guess poor Nicole forgot that ice is for skating, not smoking. Perhaps when she was falling on the ice, she was really just tasting it.

Okay, that's just mean. I hate to see athletes end up drug dealers/users. I hope she gets the help she needs. She represented our country in international competition, we owe her at least a second chance.

Well, it has been a while and I'm going to try and be better about posting. If not for myself, then for Jane.

She's got plenty on her hands already and deserves better than I've been giving.

Anticipation

I'm actually writing, I just haven't finished anything to post. It's coming...I swear.

Too F'ing Hot

I had fully intended to post tonight about the Iran situation and the crap that the Republican's are pulling to slow health care reform, but our air conditioner died and it is really hot and humid here tonight. I feel like the lead character in a Tennessee Williams play...sweaty, cranky and well written.

I'll get back to this in a day or so when either my bourbon level increases or the temperature drops.

Why People Like Obama...an Example

After living through the intellectual and emotional void that was the Bush administration, having a President that gets what people are about and isn't afraid to show it is so refreshing. For example, at an event yesterday in Wisconsin where President Obama was making the case for health care reform, he started taking questions from the crowd.

Yes, real questions from real people. It's this thing that real democratic leaders do on a regular basis.

One question came from a man who had his 10-year-old daughter with him. He said that he hoped that she didn't get in trouble for skipping the last day of school at which point President Obama offered to write her teacher a note.

And then he did it.

Classic. In one simple move he frames himself as a father who gets the day-to-day stuff we all live with and he gets great press at the same time.

The funny part is, I'm sure some rightwing nut job is out there right now trying to use this as proof that President Obama is really anti-education.

The girl's name: Kennedy Corpus. I have to ask...do you think her parent's considered going the full nine yards and naming her Christi? Think about the fun that would have been on those "last name first" school forms.

MSNBC.com: Obama writes girl a note for missing school

I'm sorry in advance...

Did you hear the name of David Carradine's new movie?

Hung Fu

Quick Hits: Now with Religious Fervor

I Kissed a Girl

A Catholic priest was defrocked because he was caught kissing a girl. He has now decided to join the Episcopal church. While I'm not sure why this is news, I'm pretty sure that the Catholic Church should be thrilled. Not because their ex-priest has found a new religious home, but because they had a priest caught kissing a girl and not a 12 year-old alter boy. Personally, I think they are making real progress.

Catholic Priest Caught Kissing Girlfriend Joins Episcopal Church

Legalized Torture, Not Just for the Bush Administration

In Nebraska, a woman seeking an abortion will soon be forced, for no medical reason, to see an ultrasound of her fetus before the procedure is performed.

What kind of fucked up, right wing wack jobs thought this one up?

Do they honestly believe that a woman having an abortion hasn't already pictured the child inside of her? Do they seriously believe that the choice the woman/girl made was an easy one?

And now, just because they can, they are going to force these women to have an unneeded viewing of the fetus they are about to abort.

Why?

Because unless the woman happens to be an Iraqi enemy combatant in Gitmo, they can't waterboard her first.

I am sick of these holier-than-thou jackoffs. If they were the victim of a rape, would they want to be forced to see the product of that rape? If they were an impoverished, unwed teenager who can't care for herself, let alone a child, would they want to be forced to see the fetus before they made the only choice they could really make? And do they seriously believe that the fetus they are about to show these women looks that much different than the ones on the signs being held by their fanatical friends outside the clinic?

They don't care. You see, they think torture is good. That's right, they think that Jesus would be standing beside them as they caused a fellow human being, however flawed in his eyes, to feel pain and suffering in a time of despair and desperation.

And then they will go home feeling good about it. The Bible told them to do it, just ask them. Oh...I'm sure they are right. That's exactly what I remember reading in the bible. I think it went: "Thou shall torture those who act outside of your beliefs."

Yeah, that sounds like something Jesus would do, I'm sure of it.

I think I'll add this new law to the list of things that make me thankful that I don't live in Nebraska...it will fall between number 21 (It was the crappiest album Springsteen ever made.) and number 23 (Bush hid there on 9/11).

Nebraska Lawmakers Pass Abortion Ultrasound Bill

Health Care: A Right or a Privilege?

There has been a lot of discussion on the Thom Hartman program on Air America about whether health care is a right the way education is in our country. Every child has the right to go to a public school. But does every American have the right to see a doctor?

This debate rages as the liberals and the conservatives take generally different views. The liberals generally argue that access to health care is a right while the conservatives say that there is no guarentee to health care.

I have a small problem with the conservatives hypocracy on this one.

A couple of years ago, George Bush told an audience in Cleveland that all American's had access to health care, they just needed to go to the emergency room. Now the reason that any American can go to the emergency room is because of a little thing called the Emergency Medical Treatment and Active Labor Act. It basically says that the emergency room has to at least see you and stablize you.

My point is this, if I have a right to this under the law, how can health care be a priviledge?